13:54 Getting ready for work.

13:59 Hope work is dead. Id say it is likely being that it is only 10 degrees out and getting colder.

14:01 I just thought I missed New Years and therefore the Twilight Zone marathon that is always on New Years Day.

14:01 lol ...Show how much I dont know what day it ever is.

14:38 I shall cover up your blue Walmart. dailybooth.com/u/1dz1r

15:49 Pair of pink boots i need to save for 7 hrs. will hide.

15:53 I need the help of someone that can draw or do computer graphics. contact me & ill give u info

17:39 Please dont rap in the break room.

19:41 Freezing in store.

21:04 What you see is not all there is.

21:15 Praise the lord- someone turned off star wars.

21:41 I wonder if im the only person that is jealous i havent been abducted by aliens?

21:48 Need to find books focusing more on alien-human hybrids. think it is very possible i am one.

23:59 A newish hot one. Now theres 2. I amuse myself too much at work sometimes with my thoughts. lol

00:00 Actually had a weird sync with him too with something he asked me and something I said on Twitter earlier.

00:06 Several people replied to me about drawing/ graphics so Ill say what I want and if anyone can help let me know... it is fairly simple...

00:07 Need a heart w/ crossbones. Heart being hex #FF00FF and outlined in black and bones being black. Need two done. One plain & one w KANDYDEVIL

00:09 The original idea was this fav.me/d2aicn5 which I love but I dont know if he ever finished it. So something similar. Creepy yet girly

00:13 10 Words You Need to Stop Misspelling theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling from @oatmeal

00:23 Chilly Willy. Brrrr. dailybooth.com/u/1e55t

00:25 Just took my 124th mugshot! www.dailymugshot.com/main/show/13370

00:29 I bought some beer called Full Moon which is a variation of Blue Moon neither of which Ive ever had.

00:45 Suicide Commando guy approved my last.fm request. I told him his music makes my soul happy. lmao.

01:42 Come on beer, work!

01:43 Nothing can get me buzzed except whiskey and then that is bad.

01:52 One of the best songs/ lyrics of all time. Especially the last line www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/nineinchnails/hurt.html

01:52 If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

01:59 One day Id like to go to NYC for NYE again but not like when I went before. Was so lame. You could only get thru in sections....

02:00 I got through to next section and the lame bf I had was too slow & got left behind in the other section so we spent most of the night apart

02:01 & dont even think about getting anywhere near Time Square. Its impossible. They close off the street hours be4 then u have to try 2 get back

02:02 But if I could figure out how to go and it not suck then Id like to do it again. lol

02:04 Any locals going to the Slayer and Megadeth show coming up?

02:12 Whatever song comes on next means something. The Universe says so. Lets see what it is...

02:14 "The Bleeding" Five Finger Death Punch... hmmm... idk...

02:15 I dont think that is applicable right now. Next song after this then. lol

02:18 The Berzerker "Forever"... Gonna have to look up the lyrics to this one.

02:19 I do believe this is kinda perfect actually. Thanks Universe. www.elyrics.net/read/b/berzerker-lyrics/forever-lyrics.html

02:20 "This is my world,
and i see what you don't"

02:26 Or maybe the "Forever" is the clue because now In This Moment's "Forever" is playing.

02:26 Or maybe the "Forever" is the clue because now In This Moment's "Forever" is playing.

02:31 I hope tomorrow is as slow at work as today and that I have the dept to myself again.

02:31 Wearing a hoodie works too. Nobody thinks I work there even more so.

02:32 I swear I could clock in there then go home and then come back to clock out and nobody would know the difference.Although dept would be mess

02:33 Funny how I make work look so neat yet home is complete opposite.

02:35 Well nothing to do at work other than straighten up and think I guess.

02:37 YAY Johan (Suicide Commando) replied. \m/ I love my life. lol

02:41 Some of my favorite people in music have talked to me this year. Thats pretty awesome. Ill never forget that comment from Manson. lmao

02:43 And Gavin Rossdale was apparently checking me out according to my mother which pretty much makes my life complete.

02:44 Next year let's get Fiona Apple to talk to me and then it will truly be complete! That lady changed my life.

02:50 I need a Native American name... like The Cold Raven or something... or Wandering Raven.

02:50 My first love's mom used to use the name Raven online... wonder if thats why we got along so well. Both ravens.

03:44 15000 posts by 2010. Will do.

04:00 Sleep soon. Still didnt do what I wanted to do that Ive been wanting to do. Must do !

04:04 Work 4-11 tomorrow. Perfect hours. Little bit of a shorter day but still get my lunch break aka reading and shopping break.

09:29 Temporarily awake. Want to sleep long today so I am less drained cuz things I want/need to do tonight but Ill probably be drained anyway.

09:45 Snowing.

10:47 Got an email from my mom. She is liking Apocalyptica.

10:50 Sad to hear that someone I knew on Twitter that dated C after me has committed suicide. Surprising. She seemed like such a strong woman.

10:51 I really enjoyed her tweets. She was a lot like me.

10:55 Who proposed to me on formspring? lol

10:58 Maybe the same person that proposed on my Myspace comments as well. lol

11:05 Maybe shouldnt bother cleaning. C probably wont wanna hang out on nye anymore.

11:08 But I should clean anyway for the sake of my own self. It is honestly wall to wall mess with nowhere to walk. But later after more nap.

12:11 Its like 100 degrees in here.

12:12 Thank you @tweethug

12:53 community.livejournal.com/wtf_inc/7648534.html

14:40 Working on my mix. Arm numb now. Too many songs.

14:51 Il always be adding to it as I think of more but here it is so far...

14:52 twitpic.com/vmdho - Part 1

14:52 twitpic.com/vmdif - Part 2

14:53 Mostly old school favorites.

15:10 #nowplaying my never-ending way cool mix

15:11 Can already think of things I need to add to it.

15:11 Something tells me I will not be going back to sleep... Or cleaning... But I must!

19:17 Sleep not possible.

19:22 Think I will not be cleaning tonight. Would overheat from deathly hotness. Gonna drink some plum sake.

19:25 The Universe is there with me. Put my mix on shuffle and the first song it plays is "Never is a Promise" which is my all time song. <3

19:27 lol love the list ive just been added to.

19:28 Oh Universe! Next it plays Cold. You are awesome.

19:30 Maybe I can clean tomorrow after work when it is 5 degrees out.

19:46 This heat is so wrong.

19:48 I should go wine shopping. I want some of that cheap pink white wine with a chick walking a dog on the label.

19:50 Want to add more songs to my mix.

19:55 What Im gonna do now is work on my photos from the ITM show that I never got to.

19:57 Ill Twitpic as I go.

20:04 I dont like the quality of the pics from the camera I was using at all. Damn, my old one takes better pics than that one.

20:05 Gonna order a small Canon 12 MP. So I can take good pics at the Aiden show next month.

20:07 And an awesome person says he is taking me to Cold in Syracuse also in Feb. Which is like the awesomest thing anyone has ever offered to do.

20:08 twitpic.com/vnsc1 - Motionless In White

20:09 Fuck. It was not supposed to be sideways.

20:11 Technical difficulties.

20:18 twitpic.com/vntvk - This is fucking cool creepy pic. I did nothing to it.

20:20 Really disappointed in the quality of these pics. Its like a toy camera.

20:23 twitpic.com/vnuox - MIW

20:28 twitpic.com/vnvjm - synth \m/

20:32 twitpic.com/vnw88 - I forget what band this was. lol

20:34 twitpic.com/vnwm6 - In This Moment drums

20:42 twitpic.com/vnxuq - ITM. Really disappointing quality... and water bottles.

20:47 twitpic.com/vnykj - Not so great but I like it. ITM

20:49 twitpic.com/vnyw9 - Slight variation. ITM

20:55 Lighting is so bad at Northern Lights.

20:58 twitpic.com/vo0bi - lol I think Chris was smiling for me.

21:00 twitpic.com/vo0nc - Bad pic but sexy boys.

21:05 twitpic.com/vo1bm - Good Lord.

21:06 Hes lukcy I didnt try to molest him.

21:14 twitpic.com/vo2r0 - A duet!

21:22 twitpic.com/vo3u2 - Finally a non blurry one of Maria.

21:25 twitpic.com/vo4di - Not sure what I did to this but I like it

21:32 Okay most of those were really disappointing but the close up of Blake Bunzel made it all worth it!

21:38 Okay, new years resolution: I will not miss as many shows next year as I did this year. I will take taxis home even if I hate it and is $$$!

21:57 Maybe I should change my standing spot at shows... But damn I love front right side. Thats always been my spot. I have a thing with angles.

21:58 For the Gavin Rossdale show I was kinda center for once. I mean I had to be for that.

21:59 For the Killer and the Star I had a bad spot. I did front left and it sucked. Which is why I have no pics from that.

22:05 Just remembered I never did anything with my Metallica pics either. WIll do now but I know they are terrible.

22:06 twitpic.com/voavi - Metallica

22:08 twitpic.com/voba3 - Useless Lamb of God pic.

22:14 twitpic.com/voc8p - The balls of Metallica.

22:19 twitpic.com/vocxr - And one of Scooter just because.

22:21 twitpic.com/vod9r -

22:39 Who are Clutch? Playing tomorrow with a rather high ticket price for NL.

22:41 Last.fm says they are "stoner rock" ... lol... okay.

23:22 Updated gallery kandydevil.deviantart.com/gallery/

23:40 At some point I want to clean up my show pics on Myspace and only include the good ones.

00:01 Sake Bloody Mary and Diet Coke anyone?

00:12 I should make some new years resolutions. I never do but I want to continue to advance. Ill make a list on LJ.

00:40 Some of the questions on my formspring make me feel like I am extremely famous or something. Am I more famous than I know? lol

01:56 Was looking through someones favorites of Rev Theory on Deviant Art and I look at some and think "those are good" and they are mine. lol

02:01 I need to spend more time on Devaint Art and add to my favorites.

03:09 Man I wish the Ambien would fuck me up like it did the first night of starting on it again. I need it in order to do some things. lol

03:26 Was gonna order a camera tonight but I am too out of it now.

03:31 Listening to Grundig which is what Cold apparently were originally named.

03:34 Thought I wanted Canon Powershot but it is Canon Cyber Shot that is the better one and it is uglier so now idk.

03:42 I think once again Ill be going to bed without doing what I wanted to do.

03:43 Fuck my anxiety. Even on the net. DIE!

03:53 How did that Avenge Sevenfold guy die?

03:55 Ah man I predicted 1 more celebrity death before the year ended and here it is.

04:07 Tomorrow!

04:08 Think I need to go to bed. 2 Ambiens later that did nothing.

04:09 Leave me some for the morrow www.formspring.me/kandydevil

09:17 Whiskey is evil.

16:08 kandydevil.tumblr.com/post/303201309

16:29 Nothing is ruined.

16:49 BTW excuse my whiskey induced freakout last night to anyone that may have caught that before I deleted most of it.

17:05 Oh yay it is going to be 5 degrees coming home on Tues. That is a bit too cold for me.

17:06 Crap, nye is Thursday? My plans are all wrong. This leaves no day to clean unless I do it tomorrow. lol I thought it was Friday.

17:11 Wonder if C knows it is Thursday? I dont think he does.

17:12 Gotta get the champagne.

17:18 Maybe no champagne and no apt. If I can work that out but I doubt I can.

17:18 But I want champagne.

17:28 I wish there were more songs in the world like "Floods" by Pantera.

17:33 I dont know how anything is going to happen really. There are multiple things supposed to happen. Guess Ill wing it.

17:41 Someone enforce that I clean up tomorrow. I need to anyway.

18:50 My hand is now numb from unfollowing so many people.

18:50 Will continue later.

19:12 There also should be more songs in the world like "Enter" by Within Temptation. This mix is epic. Gonna add to it later.

19:12 There also should be more songs in the world like "Enter" by Within Temptation. This mix is epic. Gonna add to it later.

19:21 Time to do some Myspace surveys.

20:06 Ive got the Gathering cued up to play for the rest of the night.

20:08 Havent checked this in a while. Only have a few to answer. Ask me some www.formspring.me/kandydevil

20:10 Someone wrote me a song. That is fucking awesome. Lots of love to whoever did that.

20:27 Old the Gathering with the male singer is weird. But still good. Just sounds like a completely different band.

20:39 It is extremely hot in my apt as usual and it is horrible.

21:24 Not enough Jackson Rathbone communities on LJ.

21:34 Now that I am back on Ambien I am drained again all the time.

21:36 Guess listening to the Gathering is not helping. My sleepy music.

21:57 Nobody wants to ask questions tonight. =(

23:07 Holy crap there are questions now. Thanks. lol

00:51 Bleh I think I gotta go nap.

13:16 Plum sake = good. Chili chocolate = weird but good. I just now opened my Xmas gifts because I didnt feel like it yesterday...

13:16 And I knew what most things were already anyway being that I picked them out.

13:18 I think it is funny when my grandmother buys me thongs.

13:23 SO cute when Smokie sits on my amp looking at me.

13:30 Whoa I did not set my desktop to this although I remember opening up the picture last night... must mean something...

13:33 twitpic.com/vc33l - Desktop

14:46 Oh, I see someone replied to me. I expect a one word email again. Ill read it later. lol

14:55 I do believe that is the greatest Tweet of all time.

15:03 #in2010 I must goto NYC AT LEAST once. Id like to maybe start taking a monthly train/bus trip actually. Make it my 2nd home.

15:09 Was thinking I should have put Danzig on my mother's mix cd then I realized I dont even have any on my comp. I shall change this now!

15:35 I just keep listening to this mix I made my mother. Must add to it to make it complete will all favorite songs.

15:46 Every day I go through my timeline and unfollow people but never anyone that is following me even if I want to. I am too nice.

15:48 I have no idea what this "pink bird" represents but I find it when searching "pink" on Twibbon. It is some Japanese thing.

15:59 Obsession kandydevil.tumblr.com/post/301674479

16:05 Who has Tumblr? Need more peope.

16:17 Working on my photo dump kandydevil.tumblr.com/

17:07 I maxed out Tumblr usage for the day. lol

17:33 RT @Daisy_DeLaHoya Create "Reality"... Do not let "Reality" create you!

17:47 I want it to be after midnight so I can post more on Tumblr...

17:50 And take Ambien...

17:54 Anyone going to the Aiden show on Feb 1st? I most likely will be there.

18:13 bestuff.com/profile/kandydevil Came across this profile of mine. Adding stuff to it.

18:23 Weird. It is almost the same exact pic as the GC pic that I took that is my fave bestuff.com/stuff/grand-canyon

19:13 Each day I wonder why Im following so many randoms that are neither cute nor interesting. Maybe they were cute or interesting at some point?

19:22 I also wonder why so many nobodies have "official" in their username.

19:26 Is it time for Ambien yet?

19:27 Ill stop unfollowing for now. I am at 6,066. I like that number.

19:30 Oops I unfollowed another. No use in stopping anymore I guess. lol

19:46 Im on a roll. Not stopping until I get to under 5000.

20:01 I meant under 6000 not 5000. Done.

20:05 I think the pink bird probably doesnt mean anything. Probably just a pink Twitter bird.

20:17 Cannot stop!

20:47 Semi-daily Myspace surveys done.

21:22 I hate when people say "IKR" ... Who even says "I know, right?" in real life?

21:22 I hate when people say "IKR" ... Who even says "I know, right?" in real life?

21:23 i48.tinypic.com/2ch2gkw.jpg IKR!

21:27 That is an awesome cat bed icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/funny-pictures-cat-sits-in-computer.jpg

21:30 I now like soccer.. or whatever it is that they are playing. failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/epic-fail-kick-fail.jpg

21:59 Happy birthday Jordan Catalano! I mean @jaredleto !

22:23 Scrolled down to see this and my first thought was "home" ...I need to be there.... community.livejournal.com/cityscapes/2042776.html

22:30 I love his words www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/cold/stripherdown.html

22:33 Was trying to think of a "C" word to go with Chel the other day and couldnt. Why didnt I think of the obvious? (ra)Chel Cold =)

22:35 So, anyone know how to do this? blog.storytlr.com/entry/come-in-we-are-now-open--151-22302.html

23:10 Weird. Sync involving Scooter & Schenectady which is a close by city. I know he lives in FL which is why its weird this profile says that.

23:11 Im sorry, forgive my obsession. lol

23:11 I really dont know where the obsession came from. Ive always been a Cold fan but only recently has it become so much deeper and personal.

23:13 Ive always known he was special though. The 1st couple times I saw him live the emotion he put out while performing was incredible & moving.

23:14 I recall certain moment that I just knew.He was down on the ground singing & it was an amazingly passionate moment.All I could think was WOW

23:17 He has "Let the Rain Begin" up now. New profile song for me. Thats my song.

23:17 He has "Let the Rain Begin" up now. New profile song for me. Thats my song.

23:18 I think I am in love. LMAO.

23:20 Different demo actually. Well different than the one I have. I like the one I have better.

23:43 So, who wants to take me to Syracuse or PA or NJ to see Cold?

23:51 www.last.fm/music/Cold/+events

23:54 I think a swig of whiskey is in order.

00:00 mmmmm Wild Turkey 101. Tastes like home.

00:11 WHISKEY!

00:12 If we are to be bestest friends my ask of my bestest friernfs to go to shows. lol Thats all I really ask of a person. lol

00:16 I am on 176 buddy lists on aim? Only about 5-10 people even have my sn.

02:27 =(

03:11 i HEAR THE RAIN.......... PLEASE LET THE RAIN BEGIN <3

03:23 Scooter your words touch my heart. Bring tears to my eyes.

03:26 I feel like there is love... but i cannot use that word. Especially now. Wish I could.

03:35 Im there already. No use in denying it. You have me whether you want me or not.

03:44 www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/t/the_killer_and_the_star/questions.html

04:03 Goodnight. If Im not heard from for a bit no need to worry.

07:51 I cant sleep at all. Too much stuff going through my head. I feel wonderful. I was awoken last night in a spiritual sense even more so.

07:52 This has been a wonderful Xmas week. Scooter's message to me, Maria Brink's phone call and letter and @TimberWolfe_09 being so amazing.

07:55 I have awoken. I see all these possibilities now. Anything is possible. Everything is possible.

07:56 Anyway, Chazz and I are gonna hang out on NYE and I want to meet some Twitter people that said they wanted to meet. NYE = break out day.

08:00 There is a certain person I would like to meet on NYE because I personally feel it is the right day...

08:01 ...but I dont think he thinks its the right day because it is not an 11 day or whatever number he said. Cant keep up with numbers. lol

08:04 Need to try to get a lil more sleep or else Im gonna be in a bad mood later.

11:15 Sleepymas.

11:39 My very Xmassy In This Moment tour shirt. Meowy Cheesemas =) dailybooth.com/u/1csjv

11:47 I guarantee my hair doesnt look that beautiful icey blonde in person. How I wish it did.

12:52 About to head over to my mother's.

15:01 Beer goes straight to my tingle.

15:02 Sleepy bored & horny.

15:04 Want to go home and listen to Cold.

15:43 Need silence and darkness.

15:44 And sleep.

16:03 Life is better w puppies on your lap.

16:15 I wanna get fucked up.

16:16 Sitting here playing w camera.

16:54 Tofurky not very good. Quron better.

17:15 Damn Ambien. i.e. last night.

17:31 Cant wait to sleep for multiple days. Hope nobody planned to stickam with me 2nite.

18:57 Im home. So much stuff to add to the pile. Not dealing with it tonight.

18:57 I probably shouldnt have invited C for NYE because that means cleaning up and there is no use in even attempting to clean up.

19:00 That show Clean something or other was on all day at my moms where they have messiest houses they can find. Mine honestly looks like them.

19:01 But I only have a studio apt. Theres nowhere to put anything.

19:08 I shouldnt be allowed at holidays because Im never in a good mood for them cuz I am not normally awake in the day time.

19:13 I am most happy amongst the chaos of my physical belongings and the calm of my solitude.

19:14 Im a strange one... idk...

19:16 My music, my cat, my chaos... my home.

19:18 And the world is made to believe that it is wrong. But it is not wrong.

19:20 Ive been very cold today. This is unusual.

19:33 Belly hurts. Gonna lay down soon and hopefully sleep.

19:35 My Suicide Commando shirt never came. Wonder if they refunded me. They better have. Will check later. 2nd time that site has crapped out.

19:36 I probably should give up on finding a Suicide Commando shirt in America.

19:37 I should ask the Suicide Commando dude about it. I added him on last.fm. Dont know if he ever approved it or not.

19:40 Maybe I stay awake little longer and flood Twitter with my nonsense and whatever the opposite of nonsense is.

19:42 Maybe not. Goodnight twits.

20:29 I have a check for "200 dollars and no cents"... I am kinda offended. Can't I have a cent?

20:29 I have a check for "200 dollars and no cents"... I am kinda offended. Can't I have a cent?

20:29 Yeah... I can't sleep. Thoughts of my two soulmates dominate my mind. lol

20:31 All my Cold syncs from not too long ago led me somewhere, no? It is indeed true that synchronicity is a sign you are on the right path.

20:32 There are things I want to say regarding that but I will keep to myself and await more wonderment =)

20:33 I need to write a book. My thought process is far too massive to be contained in Twitter.

20:34 I wonder if it is rude to ask bands for photo passes? I would die to be able to use the Rebel at shows.

20:37 In goes the Ambien. Out will come whatever comes when I take Ambien. Which is all kinds of stuff from my psyche.

20:48 Need to write LJ entry. Too much thought right now that have been building since last night.

21:02 #nowplaying TKATS... my beautiful lovely.

21:05 twitpic.com/v91m5 - I want this as a tattoo. Right now. And one day he will sign it for me!

21:36 photobucket.com/images/raven%20wolf/ =)

21:44 twitpic.com/v98c8 -

21:44 twitpic.com/v98ds -

21:44 twitpic.com/v98hq -

22:07 Anyone know the artist of the pic in my icon?

22:32 Aw Nelsain says the pic I sent him was the best gift hes gotten in a long time.

22:36 Only Nelsain and Chazz replied to my emails from last night. As I expected. Although hearing from Jon would be nice.

22:37 The other person I dont want to hear back from anyway. Just wanted to fully bring closure to that lil thing.

22:38 And to prove I can be the stronger person.

22:42 Think about NYE. NYE is the day I tell you! lol But I understand if it is a no.

22:46 lol i wasnt meaning I had something to tell you. i was meaning it is the day INDEED aka "i tell you"... or something... now im confuzzled

22:48 Doesnt have to be any big thing. Just the initial meeting. And you may go on your merry way. lol

22:51 Well it is a good thing you arent a serial killer because i tend to like serial killers a bit too much. lol

22:56 Have a good night Wolfie.

23:04 Or tomorrow while both are getusst! That seems it could work too. lol You are gonna have to tell me when I guess. lol

23:05 Im delirious from no sleep. Dont mind me.

23:08 Im gonna start telling my anxiety srtaight up to fuck off. Ive gotten this far. Anxiety is the only thing that stands in my way anymore so

23:08 FUCK YOU ANXIETY. YOU AINT SHIT. There I did it =)

23:11 I still think NYE. That is the transitioning period. Seems right.

07:44 Ahh tonight was weird. Going to bed.

07:44 boys on webcam are quite fun.

17:35 The loathe to get out of bed. But since I gotta wake up tomorrow I must.

17:43 #09memories ~ freedom, peace and solitude. The shifting of one existence into another.

17:47 Last night on Stickam I was told I look like Avril Lavigne, Scarlett Johansson and Brittany Murphy....

17:47 Although I doubt the Brittany Murphy thing would have come up if she hadnt just died because that is a first.

17:48 First... no second for Scarlett. That bitch is hot. I kinda always thought that my ex's sister looks exactly like her.

17:48 And I get the Avril thing all the time.

18:06 Im Jack Frost. I am wonderful.

18:12 Wish I could sleep through tomorrow.

18:13 Xmas with 3 people who hate Xmas = fun times.

18:21 Scary Xmas or Meowy Cheesemas. Which ever you celebrate. ;-) the-kandydevil.livejournal.com/731220.html

18:28 My father didnt even send me a personalized Xmas card. Just a boxed one. How nice.

18:32 For that (& other reasons) I might detract part of my gift 2 him. Dont even know how Im giving it to him anyway.My gma will probably drop it

18:32 For that (& other reasons) I might detract part of my gift 2 him. Dont even know how Im giving it to him anyway[..] st.tl/61jYF

18:34 Only reason I got anything additional tho was so I could address it to both him and his gf.

18:39 I find it quite rude indeed and it bothers me. Part of gift now being subtracted.

18:46 It is inexcusable to send your only "legit" child a boxed Xmas card. Its a new low.

18:48 If I was indifferent to it I wouldnt care & would have kept the gift as was but it made me feel bad and that is not excusable.

18:48 If I was indifferent to it I wouldnt care & would have kept the gift as was but it made me feel bad and that is not excusable.

18:50 An Xmas gift is earned. Not an automatic.

18:53 I feel like crap tonight. Holidays always depress me. No matter what holiday.

19:04 Now I am gonna go to CVS to get something to replace the chocolates that I just ate half of for my father....

19:04 Thanks for making me cry dad on Xmas eve.

19:51 Replaced the chocolates, bought cards which I was gonna skip out on this year and bought Smokie a dog Snuggie and tuna...

19:52 And now feel bad that I didnt get my mom's dogs and cats anything because I did last year and was only one that got them anything...

19:52 Oh welll. I cant do everything I guess.

19:53 Even got my dad a non generic Xmas card. Because I am better than that.

19:53 Not a father card because most of the cards were gone anyway but I got one that is addressed to two people for him and Becky.

19:54 Figured Id get cards after all because I know my mom and gma love cards and if I got them cards and not my dad one Id feel bad.

19:54 Smokie is not going to like her Snuggie I dont think. lmao.

19:55 Tons of people doing last minute Xmas shopping at CVS. Guess it is the only thing open now. Even Walmart closes at like 630 on Xmas eve.

19:55 Just because other people suck doesnt mean that I have to. And that is all I have to say about it.

19:59 #In2010 I will continue my quest for knowledge and deeper understanding of existence.

20:02 I will also bring Smokie a doggie bag tomorrow. Chesses and tofurky & maybe even real turkey.

20:02 I will also bring Smokie a doggie bag tomorrow. Chesses and tofurky & maybe even real turkey.

20:02 Meowy Cheesemas @PrincessSmokie. Love u w/ all my heart.

20:05 Scary (or Merry even) Xmas to everyone that follows me. I <3 you.

20:12 Gonna burn my mom some cds now. Gonna be tough deciding what to put on them. Im gonna wanna include too much stuff.

20:51 Didnt know so much could fit on a damn cd.

20:51 A mix cd is the best gift that can be received from me. My heart and soul goes into it. My mama is special. lol

21:29 twitpic.com/v2dui - The final mix. Figured 50 songs was enough.

21:34 Most she will like. The Suicide Commando, Wumpsuct and VNV Nation are just thrown in just in case. lol

21:34 Because I want to introduce her to that type of music.

21:40 Was gonna make a list of the songs for her but they didnt all burn in order I dont think so idk...

21:45 Now to wrap Smokie's gift and give it to her and take pics. Early Meowmas.

22:07 Smokie's Snuggie is too big. I got medium cuz my mom's chihuahuas barely fit in the small. =( She's not fond of it anyway.

22:08 Plus my camera is being dumb again. Why?

22:09 Thought last time it was being dumb was cuz of battery not being fully charged but it is now and it still is saying error messages.

22:09 Thanks several hundred dollar camera for giving me errors all the time. I do appreciate it.

22:13 Im ready for today to be done. Can I skip ahead 2 days actually?

22:21 The snuggie is back in business. Guess it is not that much too big.

22:22 lmao this is too funny.

22:37 I broke my guitar stand last night and couldnt figure out how it went. WTF? It just snaps right in. Ambien must have gotten to me badly. lol

22:46 Cold is about to beat out Suicide Commando on my top played.

22:48 www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/cold/noone.html

22:49 But I'm fine.

23:26 Smokie is getting naked.

23:26 Im listening to the mix I made for my mom. Tis damn good.

23:40 Someone remind me next Xmas that I still have tissue paper from this year. lol... If any of you are still following me then.

23:41 Wonder who of you have been following me since last Xmas?

23:48 I wonder if I hated holidays when my great grandmother was still alive? I dont think I did. Although everything was different before that.

23:49 My depression started around that time she died at 10 years old. Wonder if it has any connection? I was very close with her when I ws little

23:52 twitpic.com/v38et - She made me this when was little. Says "Rachel's love makes the world go round". She knew the truth before anybod

00:11 I should feel more inclined to go on Stickam more often like last night. Still thinking of that hot boy we chased down. lol

00:12 Plus there were a lot of interesting & (good) weird people in my chat room oddly enough.

00:14 Sometimes (rarely) I dont want to be alone anymore. But I know I probably always will be. It is my path.

00:21 "May be going thru antsy period when it comes to love & may be because your practical matters are crossing over into your romantic affairs."

00:21 That says it well I suppose.

00:29 Although maybe one day I will find someone that "gets it." If I havent already.

00:32 Ive always wondered wtf these lyrics are about. www.musicsonglyrics.com/G/thegatheringlyrics/thegatheringredisaslowcolourlyrics.htm

00:34 I especially wonder because Ive always been drawn to that song. That whole album actually but specifically that song.

00:42 I wonder if whoever lives on the left side of me is hard of hearing. I sing and play music all night long.Think they are else theyd complain

00:57 Lets make a Stickam date for tomorrow night, k?

00:58 Trying to reblond my hair. To get some of the yellowy out. Gotta get toner though at some point.

01:03 LOL I have a request for a mix cd. Hi Doug.

01:07 Anyone else that either knows me in person or wants to know me in person aka lives near me want a mix cd?

01:08 I suppose I could send a mix mp3 to anyone else via email lol but that is kinda lame.

01:10 Scratch that. I am not making mix mp3s. lol

01:18 Just thought of something nice I can do for someone for Xmas. Gonna email Nelsain from work. He'll be spending Xmas alone...

01:19 He gave me his email and phone number a long time ago and I never used either. I know he likes me a lot. Would make him happy to hear frm me

01:19 He gave me his email and phone number a long time ago and I never used either. I know he likes me a lot. Would make[..] st.tl/UjLJ4

01:19 Especially since I havent seen him in a few weeks.

01:38 Silence is rarely understood correctly. lol

01:39 K gonna email that guy and send him a picture of me but i dont know which one.

01:46 twitpic.com/v3s0x - And there it is. lol

01:46 - And there it is. lol st.tl/Wi1NL

01:54 You dont even want to know who I just emailed to say happy holidays. Not only Jon but Corey too. What is wrong with me today?! Oh the shame!

01:56 Guess I should email C2 also. He is probably all miserable. I doubt an email will make him feel any better but whateves.

01:59 There Xmas emails to 3 exs sent. If I had Jesse email Id probably mail him too. lol

02:29 Ive done my good deeds today. Sleep soon.

02:44 Oh Sweet Universe. I do love you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you to no end. I love you.

02:45 The man I am obsessed with in the band I am obsessed with (2 bands) send me a message on Facebook a few weeks ago that I just now checked.

02:47 So it makes me happy that he has me all tracked down and stuff. lol Oh Scooter how I love thee.

02:47 That was indeed my Xmas gift from Santa. Thank you Santa. =D

02:48 Life is a beautiful thing. Especially when you can connect with other that are the same as you. Thats when you feel it.

02:53 *sigh* To be in love with a rockstar. lol

02:55 Remind me to check messages and stuff more often!

02:56 Oh one of your favorite people evenr from your favorite band is trying to get in contact with you. No big. CHECK DAMN MAIL!

03:01 I have 3 possible soulmates. 1 is dead so that eliminates LaVey. One is someone living close by yet Ive never met and the 3rd is Scooter.

03:06 I will go to bed smiling tonight. I am on the right place. I know this for sure as of tonight.

03:07 Ive learned. Ive healed. Ive taken a step in the right direction. My path lies before me.

03:07 Good thing await in 2010.

03:08 things*

03:09 Good night and Merry Christmas.

08:07 Had the urge to get straight out of bed and dye my hair.

08:20 Must occupy self for 40 minutes while head is on fire.

09:09 Hair never comes out right. Too orangey.

09:11 Gotta go to work a lil early. So Ill have time to shop both before and after work.

09:11 Hopefully nap before then but not much of one.

14:46 How is it possibe that an "extra" blonding kit makes my hair darker? Was platinum in some spots now & now those spots are yellow. Bull.

14:50 Made a stuffing sandwich. Later will be mashed potato or macaroni sandwich.

15:52 Ive been led to start reading Passport to the Cosmos today.

16:03 Someone on my floor is listening to reggae xmas music.

16:10 Forgot other 2 symbols.

16:53 Ahh shut the fuck up. i hate the break room early.

17:49 Its my go & hide till people gf away break.

18:30 Go and hide due to extreme boredom break.

18:55 When theres someone that smells like literal shit in your department it is time to take your break.

19:55 Im ready for today to finish.

19:59 Couldnt even concentrate on reading on break cuz cunts are so loud & star wars shit always on tv.

20:38 Damn not even quiet in the bathroom.

20:41 Ahh i used to love children. dont think i do anymore.

23:14 Ive had a crush on someone for like a year whose name i dont even know. I kinda like it like that.

23:47 Someone please tell me why I have a subscription to a fishing magazine? It makes me very sad to open my mailbox and see dead animals.

23:59 Meowy Cheesemas dailybooth.com/u/1ce2r

00:17 "It's Christmas Eve" ...Who cares... Ill never understand how people can get so excited over Xmas. Unless you are a child.

00:46 twitpic.com/uwwz5 - This is my favorite Xmas picture.

00:52 Kinda wanna go out tomorrow just to see absurd amounts of people doing last minute shopping. But Ill probably be too lazy.

00:53 Last year I worked Xmas eve and the store actually closes. Was weird being in there with no people.

00:55 I also worked new years eve & got fucked up because I did it too soon and didnt expect it to kick in so fast. lmao. That was the best.

00:57 I requested nye off this year although I doubt Ill go out anyway. But maybe. I do want to GETUSST. Whose gonna be downtown Toga on NYE?

01:52 Reminder to make mix cd tomorrow.

01:54 Maybe I go out and take some pics in town on NYE while getusst. Since Ive got shit else to do. I dont feel coldness when getusst.

02:00 Its weird that I cant feel coldness while getusst yet I always have a body euphoria as well as otherwise euphoria. And sex is amplified too.

02:03 I like that (almost) nobody knows what I am talking about when I say getusst. Even German speaking people.

02:14 Anyone wanna get a drink on new years eve or anything? Ill be wandering aimlessly.

02:21 I'm broadcasting my live Stickam stream at stickam.com/kandydevil

03:19 People on Stickam said I look like Scarlette Johansson. These are good people!

04:30 Still on Stickam. Weird peoples in my room. lol

05:06 I'm broadcasting my live Stickam stream at stickam.com/kandydevil
come get on cam!

06:53 lmao stickam still going on and bangin.

06:55 Hot ass boy on there gonna come see me. lmao. We had to chase him cuz he got on cam then left tjem we a;; wemt looking for him

07:26 Morning doves.

07:27 Hate sleeping when normal people do. Now Ill be tired at work tonight unless I can make myself nap.

07:38 Still sleepy anyway. Probably back to bed soon.

08:02 Nick Jonas gave me a virus... lol that sounded wrong...

09:03 I kinda wanna start playing Runescape again.

09:03 I should play my Wii some day. But I wont.

09:05 media.ifun.ru/v/f/vfjxu66h.gif

09:13 Gonna start using Tumblr to post random pictures I like. kandydevil.tumblr.com/

11:43 Runescape account still works. Used to play it years ago.

11:47 I dont really remember how to play it. Ill do it later.

12:00 Favorite mmorpgs everyone?

12:12 I should start playing Animal Crossing again. That was addictive.

12:15 Need to try to nap again.

12:17 Wish I could play Sims 3 but it wouldnt work on my pc and my netbook has no disk drive and probably couldnt handle it anyway.

12:20 It said I needed something for my comp for it to work and I know nothing about that stuff.

13:43 Insomnia plus headache equals suck.

14:17 Psychedelic trance music. New concept to me. Should not be listening to it sober and in need of sleep.

14:27 Probably shouldnt even try to sleep. If I sleep 2 hours I will feel more tired than I will if I dont.

17:21 Suck.

17:35 I think I shall make my mother a mix cd as an additional Xmas gift. She needs new (better) music.

17:35 Probably will end up making multiple cds because there will be too much I want to include.

17:36 Gotta go to the Land of Boredom in a bit.

17:37 kandydevil.tumblr.com/post/295694296

17:42 *Sings Apo to Smokie* ~ *Smokie gazes longingly*

17:45 Do all cats like to be sung to? lol it is really funny how Smokie seems to love it so much.

18:10 Wearing my 3 symbols to work. Dont care. Need all the help I can get today.

18:11 And I did emo side-swept hair today. lmao

20:20 Need to one day soon write down all my theories. they come to me more and more.

20:21 Baphomet likes to hide under my shirt. perv :-P

20:29 Emo hair is fun. i can cover half my face.

22:06 Soon.

22:15 Tonight i will have ambien. been few weeks so might fuck me up good.

22:17 The hair in my emo bangs is platinumy. prettyfull.

23:14 Remind me to bring gloves tomorrow. fingerless of course.

00:05 Tomorrow I do last minute Xmas shopping. The Universe made it so I get off work half an hour early to do so.

00:05 Thank you Universe.

00:09 Thank you to those that have sent me the retweet smile thing. Same back at you. I <3 my Twitter friends. Thanks for sticking w/ me. =D

00:12 RT this to anyone who made u smile in 2009. It may surprise u how many u get back. Thx for making me smile. @TimberWolfe_09

00:18 RT this to anyone who made u smile in 2009. It may surprise u how many u get back. Thx for making me smile. @JasonGowin

01:06 Early to bed tonight. Hopefully some sleep. Bye soon.

07:13 I love when animals love each other community.livejournal.com/splodefromcute/1491807.html

07:47 My Scream candle holder is live stickam.com/kandydevil

19:13 Was woken up at 3 and was pissed and been awaake since.

19:14 Im following along but Im too tired to think or reply to anything right now.

19:47 Want to watch Xmas childrens shows but cant find none. Probably missed them all this year. Want to watch Rudolph. lol

19:55 Polar Express. Think I liked that. Coming on. Tired. Must make short sentences.

20:30 Go lay down. Sleep not likely.

08:37 Went out to CVS and almost had a heart attack or blacked out or something... Probably because of the cold & carry heavy stuff...

08:37 The way I used to get in the shower when I used to starve myself and got all dizzy and had to get out and lay on the floor.

08:38 Then I get home and discover that someone amazing had done something incredibly nice for me. =)

10:05 lol I like this. Random rude blog about Saratoga idiotsbeingidiots.blogspot.com ...I could do something like that.

10:08 idiotsbeingidiots.blogspot.com/2009/10/newsflash-its-raining-on-halloween.html lmao this person is awesome

10:23 #threewordsforyou Smokie is awesome.

10:53 #nowplaying Apocalyptica

11:41 This Linda Sunblad whoever she is that sings on Apocalyptica "Faraway" needs to make more music. No listing on last.fm I like her voice.

12:00 #nowplaying Agua de Annique

12:33 Gonna have to see some of these "top 20 horror movies of the decade" community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/42258860.html

12:33 Gonna have to see some of these "top 20 horror movies of the decade" community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/42258860.html

12:34 Although the list seems quite invalid being that the Exorcism of Emily Rose is not on it.

12:35 From that list all I have seen is Audition, Saw, Dawn of the Dead and the Ring... None of which I would ever call "scary."

12:36 The Ring was kinda creepy I guess. Audition is a good Japanese movie about a chick that tortures men. Quite cool but not scary.

13:06 A long lost relative? media.peopleofwalmart.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/710.jpg

13:14 Cold posted new tour dates. None here =(

15:02 While attempting to sleep, I got a voicemail from the vocalist of one of my favorite bands. Today is a good day. The Universe smiles on me.

15:04 Brittany Murphy died? Aw I liked her. Cardiac arrest at 32? Wow. R.I.P.

15:07 Twitter is like a celebrity obituary.

15:15 In other things, it is pretty cool that Rage Against the Machine are Number one for Xmas songs. Are they even still together?

15:47 Came across kind of a neat rpg on Facebook. Dream World.

15:52 I found a kitten in Dream World and named it Smokie!

16:06 Happy Solstice Eve/ Yule. Welcome Winter =)

16:07 As a teen I made my mother give me my Xmas gifts on Yule because I was so anti Xmas.

16:24 Want to go wash my hair but Ill be cold afterward. No I do not use blow driers. Ill do it when this music is done.

18:10 i49.tinypic.com/11ie8nb.jpg

06:19 Slept a few hours. Woke up at 1 and couldnt get back to sleep.

06:21 Anybody have Bebo? Had it for years but never got into it. Playing around w/ it right now. bit.ly/7j2JxX

07:00 Listened to this song "Bittersweet"all day long.

07:00 Listened to this song "Bittersweet"all day long.

07:18 An hour is enough to be awake. Going back to bed.

11:01 engrishfunny.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/engrish-funny-upon-existing.jpg

11:22 Restless.

11:34 Want theses shoes www.gossipcenter.com/files/images/avril-lavigne-12139-5.jpg

11:35 I want to do something but I dont know what. I also dont want to do anything.

11:44 I want frosting.

12:12 Team Jasper. He is fucking gorgeous. community.livejournal.com/twilightsagafan/1198578.html?style=mine#cutid1

12:37 It is actually cold in my apt. Not normal.... Almost out of soda. Gonna have to drink tap water =(

00:16 Lame.

01:46 These Jersey Shore guys act like they are 16 or something. Do adult men really act that way? There is no hope.

01:47 I must admit that Pauly guy is cute. SO not my type but cute.

03:01 It is really very cold.

03:06 I want warmth, diet coke and cupcakes. Sadly I have none of the above.